wasting time jer =.=

i misses you everyday but i never let you know, because i don't think there's any reason for you to know about this..
i was wondering why i miss you all this while until that day..
i somehow found the answer for the reason i misses you from the first day till today..
the reason is i regretted i never cherish and treasures all the love you once given to me..
but i just having a hard time to stop myself from stop recalling you into my mind..
every time i pass by the road that we first met each other I'll somehow recall the memories we had, how awkward we were after the first met..
we were both attracted by each other, you were the person who told me that you have accidentally fall in love with me..
i was so shocked when you told me that, not because you fall in love with me is because I never thought of you'll tell me this..
but after that confession you never contact me anymore because you think I'll ignore you..
you fear the feeling of being ignored by a person who you cares about..
that's why i text you and asked you whether you'll be my girlfriend ?
you were shocked but you never reject my request..
We both were so happy at the moment we both accepted each other..
everyone around us were happy for us, we spent most of our time together and did lots of fun stuff together...
until one day, both of our parents get to know about the relationship we both have..
they tried very hard to break us apart but somehow everything they did was just a waste..
at last, they have no choice but to allowed both of us continue..
after few months they started to accepts us, and we both were very close..
until the day i saw her, and i started to get very close with her..
and you started to jealous because i tend to treat you cold even lied to you!
a few weeks later, i asked for break and you never want to break..
i even asked you to leave me alone and never come near me..
you were so sad, very very sad..
at last you accepted the fact and we both started to lost contact..
but there's something you don't know.. the girl is my cousin sister..
we both were acting so that you would leave me and concentrate on your study...
your parents told me that you get a scholarship and asked me to think about your future..
and yes, i did think about it and this is the decision that i think is best for you!
I'll never mind about you saying me cruel, heartless or cold blooded because all this while my only wish is to see you have a bright future...
i know that you would give up the scholarship just to be here with me but it's not worth!
i rather sacrifice myself.. is better for one to suffer than two people suffer together in the future..
that's the least i can do for you, i never regretted for what i did!
the reason is this is the way how i love you..
your parents thanks me for being rational..
your parents told me that you get your favourite course and get to further your study in USA
now everything is worth..